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When it's too hard, you have the right to stop

I recently supported by telehealth a mum in great difficulty with the beginning of her breastfeeding journey. Sometimes childbirth and postpartum conditions are so difficult that additional breastfeeding difficulties are physically and emotionally unmanageable.

With the pain, the stress, the rollercoaster of the hormones, one can have the impression of an obstacle course when in addition there are difficulties in setting up lactation and latching on .

You might feel lost, cry at each feed, or at each attempt to latch baby.

There is the anxiety of not feeding your baby properly, the fear of pain, the feeling that baby is rejecting you when he can't take the nipple....

And at the same time when you stop you have the impression that you will be a terrible mother, that you won't give the best to your baby.

Talking about it with someone who understands, who listens, who doesn't judge, can provide relief and allow you to make a decision more calmly.

I support you , offer you options to try to overcome these difficulties.... but it can take time, too much time for you.

So I also support you when you decide to stop "the fight", because you don't have the energy to continue. Grieving breastfeeding is difficult. You are sad, you have this feeling of failure, even though you have tried for several days and shown a lot of courage, like this mother.

We saw together how to gradually stop the lactation since that's what she chose. How to reconnect with her baby with skin to skin. How to allow herself to relax and finally enjoy her baby, discover it and admire it.... I also mentioned that sometimes, when we have regained our strength, we might consider to attempt a relactation.


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